Are you tired of being pestered to lend your car to friends and family? Do you want to say no humorously and creatively? Then this article is for you. Letting someone borrow your car can feel like handing over your prized possession – and sometimes, it’s just not in the cards. But a simple “no” can feel awkward. Look no further, responsible car owners. In this article, I have compiled a list of 20 hilarious ways to turn down a car borrowing request.
This guide offers 20 hilarious ways to politely decline a car loan, all while keeping the mood light and the friendship intact. From witty one-liners to absurd excuses, and playful exaggeration, you’ll be laughing your way out of any awkward situations.
Sorry, I Can’t Lend You My Car Because I’m Busy Watching The Paint Dry.
Your friend has just asked you to lend him your car and today just doesn’t seem like the day you wish to lend him yet you need to do it in the most friendly way ever. Relax, the above response is your life-saving response for the day.
“Sorry, I can’t lend you my car because I’m busy watching the paint dry” is a friendly and mild way to turn down your friend’s request in such a way that the friendship still holds.
Sorry, My Car’s In The Shop For A Personality Transplant.
If what you need is a silly and comical response to turn down a car loan request, then use this response “Sorry, my car’s in the shop for a personality transplant.” This response is a funny one to give out to your response and it’s a good distraction that helps divert their interest from borrowing your car to rolling in the jokes.
Also, they get the gist that you don’t want to borrow them because a silly response to a request means you don’t want to grant that request.
Unfortunately, My Car Is Out Of Gas…and I’m Not Sharing My Fumes With Anyone.
If you need another hilarious response to a colleague’s car loan request, then don’t be scared because you aren’t running out of funny responses so soon. “Unfortunately, my car is out of gas…and I’m not sharing my fumes with anyone” is another hilarious response you can use to turn down their request in a jocular manner.
I’m Sorry, But My Car Is Busy Right Now With Its Yoga Practice. It’s In Car-Ma Sutra Pose.
You can be even more creative and witty in saying no when you don’t feel like giving out your car. Here is a tip for Creative Juice to turn down their request. This statement uses a pun; a play on words on the original word “Kamasutra”, to derive a witty and hilarious statement.
When next your covetous neighbor begs to take your car out just tell him “I’m sorry, but my car is busy right now with its yoga practice. It’s in car-ma Sutra pose.” I’m pretty sure he would look at you in disbelief but don’t be bothered, it’s your car, right? So, the case is closed.
My Car Has Decided To Go On Strike And Is Protesting Against You Borrowing It.
Give them the blame game strategy this time again. It is a pretty effective way of saying no to their requests and still ends up not looking like the bad guy. It could be a neighbor pestering you for a car, just feigning a concerned look and saying “My car has decided to go on strike and is protesting against you borrowing it.” Your neighbor knows better than to stop being persistent in his request.
Sorry, My Car Is Out Of Commission. It’s Got A Bad Case Of Car-Colepsy.
Another hilarious response to dismiss someone asking to borrow your car is “Sorry, my car is out of commission. It’s got a bad case of car-colepsy.” It is a stern yet funny way to say no. Instead of being offended by turning them down, the jocular response would have helped alleviate their anger and also rendered them helpless in such an awkward situation.
I’m Afraid My Car Is Currently Unavailable. It’s Busy Taking A Nap In The Garage.
Make a deep joke out of their request especially if they are such that don’t like to take no for an answer. This is a nice response to give them. Thank goodness it is your car we are talking about here so they have no right to question you.
My Car Is Out Of Service. It’s Taking A Well-Deserved Vacation In The Driveway.
Another hilarious response to use when someone asks to borrow your car is “My car is out of service. It’s taking a well-deserved vacation in the driveway.” Make it even more real and interesting by saying in the dialogue that you would have loved to borrow them if not for the car that is out of service.
Sorry, My Car Is Having An Identity Crisis And Is Unsure If It’s A Car Or A Washing Machine.
“Sorry, my car is having an identity crisis and is unsure if it’s a car or a washing machine” This Is the best response to give a stranger you just met, who is already asking you to lend him your car. That is overstepping of boundaries and you need to let them know but in a jocular manner, don’t forget. Again, the above response is apt to use in such cases.
My Car Is On A Strict Diet And Can’t Take On Any Extra Weight, Including Passengers.
Saying your car is on a strict diet and can’t take on extra weight is one of the most humorous things to say to someone who wants to borrow your car. I’m sure it will throw them into heaps of laughter. Although, be sure you aren’t saying that to plus-size people. It might upset them.
Sorry, My Car Is Allergic To People Who Ask To Borrow It.
How do you say someone borrows a lot without actually saying it? I bet you the response “Sorry, my car is allergic to people who ask to borrow it” is the actual line to use. So don’t hesitate to use these lines to turn down someone who keeps borrowing. Not giving them once won’t hurt, don’t worry.
My Car Is Taking A Break From Being Borrowed. It Needs Some Me-Time.
I don’t know about anybody else but if I were told by the owner of the car this statement- “my car is taking a break from being borrowed. If it needs some me-time, I will immediately retrace my steps to avoid being more embarrassed because, from the expression, I understand that they don’t want to lend me.
So in essence, all I’m saying is that sometimes you don’t need to say plainly “No, I can’t borrow you” Some funny expressions like the one I just highlighted even hit deeper than surface replies.
Unfortunately, My Car Is Occupied At The Moment. It’s Being Used As A Birdhouse.
If you want different eyes rolled and directed at you then you should consider using this response “Unfortunately, my car is occupied at the moment. It’s being used as a birdhouse.” when someone asks to borrow your car. It becomes more interesting if it is your friend making the request and you have other friends around. I’m sure they will drink to the incredible thing you have just said.
Sorry, My Car Has Retired From The Borrowing Business And Is Now Living A Life Of Luxury In The Garage.
Another eye-rolling response to give out to your neighbor who has just asked to borrow your car is “Sorry, my car has retired from the borrowing business and is now living a life of luxury in the garage.” Let’s say, for instance, they also refuse to lend you something then this is a payback response for them.
You don’t need to even bring back the issues you had with them, with this sarcastic response the message is portrayed to them vividly.
I’m Sorry, My Car Is Busy Reflecting On Its Life Choices And Isn’t Accepting Any Requests At The Moment.
Assuming someone borrowed your car the last time and they left it with a few scratches that got you pissed, and now they are at your doorstep again begging for you to lend them again.
Look at them in a funny way that whispers “This gotta be some kind of joke” and then say to them, “I’m sorry, my car is busy reflecting on its life choices and isn’t accepting any requests at the moment.” They will get the message clearly and leave.
My Car Is Busy Practicing Social Distancing And Isn’t Available For Sharing.
It’s no longer COVID period but you can still use this funny response to turn down a car loan request if you don’t feel like giving it out. You can even pretend like you are sorry to disappoint them then go ahead to say “My car is busy practicing social distancing and isn’t available for sharing.” This is a really good and funny response to use.
Oh Dear Me, Sorry, My Car Is On A Strict No-Lending Policy. It’s A Zero-Tolerance Zone.
Another emphatic denial. It’s a zero-tolerance zone” is a humble and mild way to say you aren’t lending them your car.
I’m Sorry, But My Car Is Currently In Rehab For Its Borrowing Addiction.
There is nobody that is going to hear you say this that won’t burst out laughing. No this is very funny, I bet you. You can even make it more funny by adding a funny look before telling them “I’m sorry, my car is currently in rehab for its borrowing addiction.” I can tell you that even the person who wants to borrow your car is already choking on their laughter.
This Car Is A Legend! It’s Been In Car Shows, Won Awards, And Has A Fan Club. Borrowing It Might Be A Bit Much, Wouldn’t You Say?
You know that strategy of bragging about the quality of something when someone wants to borrow something from you to scare them away, right? Yeah! It works! You are simply implying that your car is really expensive and can’t be loaned out.
That Car Has Terrible Parking Karma. It Always Attracts Parking Tickets And Angry Tow Truck Drivers. Maybe A Bike Ride For Good Luck?
Another hilarious response to give to someone who asks to borrow your car is “That car has terrible parking karma. It always attracts parking tickets and angry tow truck drivers. Maybe a bike ride for good luck?” So here is a good response to scare them away without being mean-spirited.
Final Words
Saying no to a car borrowing request doesn’t have to be boring or mean-spirited. With these 20 hilarious excuses, you’ll be able to decline with humor and style. Remember, a little bit of wit can go a long way in turning down a car borrowing request. So the next time someone asks to borrow your car, unleash your comedic side and say no in a way that will leave them laughing instead of fuming.
