Someone just asked you about your relationship status. You may want to be truthful or deflect but you surely want to display a bit of wit when answering them. If you do, this article is the best guide for you. Here, you are going to find 20 witty replies to “Do you have a boyfriend?”
I have ensured that they are responses that fit in a wide variety of scenarios. As you read through, you’ll be able to pick the ones that appeal to you for the different contexts you’ll find yourself in.
Roses Are Red And Violets Are Blue, I Have A Boyfriend But There’s Space For You
If you have a boyfriend, you can use this response to get the questioner laughing. “Roses are red and violets are blue, I have a boyfriend but there’s space for you” highlights the presence of a boyfriend but claims there is a possibility to onboard them. They should take that as a joke but if they don’t you’ll need to be clearer to avoid issues.
A Boyfriend? Who Needs One Of Those? Obviously, Not Me
“A boyfriend? Who needs one of those? Not me” is another witty response to “Do you have a boyfriend? You should say this response with a sneer like the ‘Brother ugh” meme. Don’t forget to push the air with your hands like the Sheikh in the meme did. It’d be hilarious.
So I Can Be Babysitting A Grown Man? Nah, I’ll Pass
This is another witty reply to “Do you have a boyfriend?” There’s this neediness that almost translates to babysitting. We know this but don’t say it. So, this response isn’t out of line.
No One Wants To Date A Girl with Freckles
“No one wants to date a girl with freckles”’ is an answer that won’t be expected. Even if you do not have freckles, you can still use this response because the idea isn’t about freckles but something you have or are that most people wouldn’t want to date because of it.
It could be acne, being chubby, being a stutterer, being black, being a Latino, and so on. However, only use this when you are confident in yourself. We shouldn’t be spreading our insecurities ourselves.
- In a school full of white dudes? Nah. I am black.
- Maybe when I clear the acne on my face, I’ll get one.
You Won’t Stand A Chance If I Didn’t
Who says witty shouldn’t have some jabs? This one. “You won’t stand a chance if I didn’t” acknowledges that you do have a boyfriend and it rubbishes the questioner’s intentions to ask you out because they wouldn’t stand a chance.
Unfortunately, I Do Have A Boyfriend
You can say “Unfortunately, I do have a boyfriend” when someone asks you about your relationship status. If they decide to probe into why you’ll say unfortunately, you can phrase your follow-up response either to say “Unfortunately, I do have a boyfriend so you can’t be mine” or “Unfortunately, I do have a boyfriend, even though I don’t want to be with him.” You get the idea right?
So I Am Banned From Dating Until I Cross Menopause. Can You Wait That Long?
Another very sarcastic response to “Do you have a boyfriend?” is to say that you are banned from getting one until a certain age. Then ask the person inquiring if they are willing to wait that long. In the main example, I used menopause. However, you could use something else like “Until I graduate from college” or “Until a woman becomes president of the United States.” The goal is to give a bizarre reason for why you are banned from dating.
I See The Relationship Games Y’all Playing But I Don’t Have The Time For That
Show your class with this line “I see the relationship games y’all playing but I don’t have the time for that.” The dude’s probably going to be taken aback but it is worth it. You are insinuating that what is done in the relationship scene is nothing but games and you’ll not want to join in that bandwagon. If they aren’t going to be straight and serious, that’s a cue for them to move on.
- Not that I do, but I wouldn’t want to be messed with by boys who do not have a sense of purpose.
- I don’t want to be a part of this college’s dating scene. I’ve got standards and until I see a boy that matches them, I am staying put. Feel me?
Do you Mean Someone Who’s A Pain In The Butt And Bothers Me Almost Every Second Of The Day? Well, Sadly, I Do
This is what some lady I met in my sophomore year told me. She said boyfriends are a pain in the butt and she doesn’t want to have someone who’s buzzing their phone at every chance they get. It cracked me up.
Not that checking up on your partner is a bad thing. Just that some dudes do it way too much. If you don’t, you should say so. It is even more valid to use this line when you don’t have one.
Yeah, My Dad. He’s Right Over There
If you went out with your dad and he’s one of these fierce-looking, tattooed men that own large pickup trucks or motorbikes, you could use him to scare young, unintentional boys away just for the fun of it.
When they ask you if you have a boyfriend, you can point to where he is and describe him so they are not in doubt. It would also work if your dad is military. Do this and watch him skidaddle away.
Are You Some Special Taskforce To Eliminate Boyfriends?
This is another funny and witty reply to “Do you have a boyfriend?” This would be a good response if you haven’t necessarily built a rapport with this person and don’t think they should be asking you any personal questions. You could phrase it like this too “Were you sent to eliminate girls with boyfriends?”
If they go on with “Just asking,” you could then tell them “You shouldn’t bother asking.” You could also decide to let them know if you do.
What Are We Doing? An Interview? But I Don’t See The Cameras
This is another cheeky way to respond to someone’s question about your relationship status. It is quite a dramatic one cause you’ll need to look around as though you are searching for the cameras while doing so. Other ways you can use this response include:
- Do you have permission to interview students? What news outlet do you belong to?
- When was I booked for an interview? Oh, I remember. I wasn’t.
Hold Your Horses, Young Man. How Did We Get Here?
Similar to the response above, this one is recommended when you have begun to engage this person and feel they’ve gone ahead of themselves to ask you about your relationship status. Well, you might want to excuse their forwardness. That’s why the response has a mild tone. Don’t be too harsh as they could be trying to play safe.
You Wanted To Tell Me You Are Falling Already. Isn’t It Too Early?
You might want to quickly put an admirer in check when they ask whether you are single or not. By saying “You wanted to tell me you are falling already. Isn’t it too early?”
This is a response you should use when you don’t want to give in or are trying to be careful about developing feelings for them too.
Yes, I Do But He Could Be Replaced By The Right Candidate And You Do Not Fit The Profile
Earlier, I mentioned witty doesn’t mean no jabs. Another response you can give in this regard is “Yes, I do but he could be replaced by the right candidate and you do not fit the profile.”
The emphasis is on them not fitting the profile which means you can also use it when you do not have a boyfriend and do not think you’d want them.
I Think I Have An Idea Where This Is Going But Nah I Don’t Have A Boyfriend
You can add a sort of mystery to the conversation by saying “I think I have an idea where this is going but nah I don’t have a boyfriend.” They could be forced to let you say where you think it is going or see it as a clue to tell you their true intentions. Most of the time when boys ask girls about their relationship status, they are trying to see if there’s a chance for them.
Do I Look Bis#xual? Forgive Me. What’s Your Question Again?
There are a handful of responses already mentioned that can be used when a lady asks you if you have a boyfriend. This response is quite tricky and things could escalate speedily considering how delicate the subject is. So when you ask “Do I look bis#xual?” you should quickly add the “Forgive me. What’s your question again?”
I Am Flattered, Though. But No, I Don’t
You could tell them that you are flattered by their question. They’d wonder why you are flattered. This is where you could use some humor with truth. A typical response would be “I am flattered because I didn’t know white boys have an eye for good-looking women.” Let me highlight a few other ideas you can use:
- Well, people think I don’t look so good because of my freckled face.
- I’ve hardly met intentional men and you are showing impressive prospects.
Are You Trying To Make An Offer? Or You Just Want To Perform A Status Check?
When you aren’t sure what it is they want with the answer to the “Do you have a boyfriend?” question, you can ask them this question. From their answers, you will be able to tell their reasons for asking and respond appropriately depending on what you think of them.
Here We Go Again
“Here we go again” is the response I’ll recommend you give when someone you just met is already asking about your relationship status. Some boys are speedsters, willing to jump from one relationship to another, you don’t want that kind of energy. A response like this without any follow-up is enough to show them you are uninterested.
Before You Go
Whatever reason someone is asking you if you have a boyfriend, there are enough responses to give to them that are witty, sarcastic, and funny. Whether they are male or female, old or young, friends or acquaintances, I am confident that at least one of these 20 witty replies to ‘Do you have a boyfriend?’ will assist you in answering the query effortlessly.
