If you are a Christian reading this article, it means that you know who a priest is and you are familiar with the statement, ‘Father forgive me for I have sinned…’
Well, rada rada rada, now that we have gotten this out of the way, we will be considering how to start and grow an interesting conversation with a Priest. I’m sure that off the top of your head, you may not know what you should say.
This is why I have compiled twenty (20) funny questions to ask a priest and answers that will correspond well with these questions.
With these questions, you can have a lively and interesting conversation with a priest filled with laughter, joy, and of course, the presence of the good Lord.
20 Funny Questions to Ask a Priest
- How do you differentiate the money that belongs to the church from the money that belongs to you?
- Father, when you finally graduate from law school and become a lawyer, what should we call you?
- Which set of priests would have been called dads if it was not so suspicious?
- Why are some doughnuts called ‘the holy doughnut’?
- When does a doughnut actually become a priest?
- How do you think priests will enter heaven?
- Why do Catholic priests ‘prey’ when they enter an orphanage?
- How is exorcism conducted – like does the devil come to get the priest out of the child?
- I once heard someone call you a rabbit, is that another way of addressing a priest?
- Why do priests put lettuce spray on their salad?
- If Jesus was still around, do you think that he would have been able to eat M&Ms?
- Why did the church make a movie called The Seven Deadly Sins and the Snow White for little girls?
- It is rumored that nuns don’t wear bra, what could be the reason?
- What happens when an exorcised individual cannot pay the priest?
- What’s the most unpredictable confession you’ve ever heard from a female convert?
- Why are children always excited to show up for your Sunday school classes?
- What curses are priests popular for putting on people?
- Among a priest, a rabbit, and a minister, whose blood type is Type O?
- What drinks do priests order when they enter a bar?
- Have you ever fallen over something, and if you have, what was it?
How Do You Differentiate The Money That Belongs To The Church From The Money That Belongs To You?
People love to gossip about the clergy using the church as a means to make money, well, this funny question will surely give them something to talk about.
Even if you have the nerve to use this funny question, ensure you use it with a priest who understands a little bit of humor so that they do not think you are insulting.
- I either draw a circle or a line then throw the money in the air, and whatever lands on the other side or in the circle is mine.
Father, When You Finally Graduate From Law School And Become a Lawyer, What Should We Call You?
It is obvious to a regular priest what they should be called if they graduate from law school, but for a priest who has a sense of humor, he should definitely be called ‘Father-in-law’.
- Father, when you finally graduate from law school and become a lawyer, what should we call you?
- Father-in-law.
Which Set Of Priests Would Have Been Called Dads If It Was Not So Suspicious?
We have priests from different denominations and while all of them are also referred to as ‘Father’, there are some who are more fatherly than the rest. However, note that it is not a competition, it is merely for humor purposes.
- Which set of priests would have been called Dad if it was not so suspicious?
- Catholic priests.
Why are some doughnuts called ‘the holy doughnut’?
I’m sure that I’m not the only one who was curious about the concept of the holy doughnut and how it originated exactly. Also, if you have not heard about the ‘holy doughnut’, then you got a lot of reading to do.
- Why are some doughnuts called ‘the holy doughnut’?
- Because it is a priestly or rabbi doughnut.
When does a doughnut actually become a priest?
We all go through a process to become the better version of ourselves, and for a doughnut, they become qualified to be a priest when they are hole-y.
- When does a doughnut actually become a priest?
- It becomes a priest when it becomes hole-y.
How do you think priests will enter heaven?
The idea behind this joke is if a priest has an accident and he wakes up on an emergency trolley taking him to the ER, he will think that he’s probably on his way to heaven.
- How do you think priests will enter heaven?
- I don’t know, but I would love to take a shortcut through the children’s ward.
Why do Catholic priests ‘prey’ when they enter an orphanage?
The term ‘prey’ is used loosely in this context to
- Why do Catholic priests ‘prey’ when they enter an orphanage?
- It’s quite obvious, and it’s because they are priests.
How is exorcism conducted – like does the devil come to get the priest out of the child?
If you have ever witnessed an exorcism in any form, you will understand that it is a warfare between two spiritual forces. It’s always so serious that this question is used as a way to create laughter
- That would be reverse exorcism and I don’t think that’s how it works.
I once heard someone call you a rabbit, is that another way of addressing a priest?
A priest is usually referred to as a teacher of his congregation, so in other terms, he can be called a ‘rabbi’ meaning a teacher. Adding a ‘t’ to a rabbi in this question is what creates the humor.
- I once heard someone call you a rabbit, is that another way of addressing a priest?
- I think that’s a typo, it’s supposed to be rabbi.
Why do priests put lettuce spray on their salad?
When Jesus said, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone…’, he meant that we can eat bread, but that should not be all we do, it is important that we pray, which is why lettuce spray is important.
- Why do priests put lettuce spray on their salad?
- Because priests always have to pray.
If Jesus was still around, do you think that he would have been able to eat M&Ms?
Everyone knows what M&Ms are but only most people know what it tastes like. If Jesus was still around, he may not be able to hold an M&M in his hand long enough to eat cause it will keep falling through the hole in his hands.
- If Jesus was still around, do you think that he would have been able to eat M&Ms?
- Nah, it will keep falling through the hole in his hand.
Why did the church make a movie called The Seven Deadly Sins and the Snow White for little girls?
If there is anything, I know about the church is that they love to use relatable examples to teach the Bible, especially to young people.
Hence, the movie spoken of here may have never existed, but if it did, it would be an imitation of the original used to teach young the Bible.
- Why did the church make a movie called The Seven Deadly Sins and the Snow White for little girls?
- To educate them, I guess.
It is rumored that nuns don’t wear bra, what could be the reason?
I totally agree! If I’m gonna be handing my burdens over to the good Lord, I don’t see any reason why I should bother wearing something as uncomfortable as a bra.
- It is rumored that nuns don’t wear bra, what could be the reason?
- God supports everything, so they don’t need to.
What happens when an exorcised individual cannot pay the priest?
Any priest that properly answers this question has a great sense of humor cause we all know that priests do not charge for deliverances or exorcisms.
On the other hand, if they are not willing to pay up then they should take back their demons.
- What happens when an exorcised individual cannot pay the priest?
- He/she gets repossessed.
What’s the most unpredictable confession you’ve ever heard from a female convert?
I don’t know what goes on in the minds of people who go for confession but trust me, if you ask a priest, they have heard it all.
Most of them are no longer surprised no matter how strange the confession is. I mean, it can’t be more weird than the ones they heard last week or the ones they are likely to hear tomorrow.
- What’s the most unpredictable confession you’ve ever heard from a female convert?
- She claims that she got pregnant from the second coming because she swallowed the first.
Why are children always excited to show up for your Sunday school classes?
Some priests are so child-friendly that they generously share candies or ice cream cones just to get children excited about Sunday school. Well, if they can afford it, I don’t mind being a child too.
- Why are children always excited to show up for your Sunday school classes?
- Because they always get free ice cream cones.
What curses are priests popular for putting on people?
Marriage is bliss if it is with the right person, but there have been cases of bad marriages, and who else to blame than the priest who cast the spell?
The problem then is that the individuals willingly approach the priest to have this curse placed on them, and are still the ones that complain when things go wrong.
- What curses are priests popular for putting on people?
- Well, priests have been known to pronounce people man and wife.
Among a Priest, a Rabbit, And a Minister, Whose Blood Type Is Type O?
This funny question is totally pun-intended as the term ‘Rabbi’ was misspelled for ‘Rabbit’ hence it’s a typo. Also, imagine a coincidence where the Rabbi’s is really Type O.
It will then be a typo with a type O, LOL!
- Among a Priest, a rabbit and a minister, whose blood type is Type O?
- I believe it’s the rabbit.
What Drinks Do Priests Order For When They Enter a Bar?
I’m not a priest so I don’t know what one would likely order for but I bet that if you ask one, they would prefer a sacramental wine (at least it’s non-alcoholic).
The question then will be ‘Do they have sacramental wine in bars?’ and even if they do, it will be a needle in a haystack type of job to find one that do.
- What drinks do Priests order when they enter a bar?
- They mostly order the finest sacramental wine.
Have You Ever Fallen Over Something, And If You Have, What Was It?
In case you haven’t noticed, the Gen Z’s and the oncoming Gen Alphas have set the bar quite low in lots of things and the millennials seem to be tripping over it in total shock.
Let’s hope that they adjust as soon as possible. And if you are such a curious cat like me, you can further ask them how this generation has set the bar low and watch them make you laugh in return.
(PS: You could also learn a lot from their response).
- Have you ever fallen over something, and if you have, what was it?
- Well, this generation set the bar too low and I was not aware so I tripped over.
Summarily,
Going to church and saying hello to the priest should not be such a chore anymore. With these interesting and funny questions, you can strike up an interesting conversation with the priest and get them laughing in no time.
